Doctors and Such.....

I am a terrible blogger!!!! Oh well, today I have a heavy heart and maybe this will help. Mike and I have had a rough start to 2010. First, I have had a headache everyday for about 3 months now. I have always suffered from migraines but lately they are daily and really interfering with our everyday lives. Its sooo frustrating. I feel like everytime I go to my doctor he gives me a shot, makes sure I feel better and sends me on my way. This last week, I went and he put me on a daily prevenative drug and gave me Relpax for when I get a headache. I really thought we were getting somewhere but then I found out I can only get 10 Relpax per month. WOWZA! Lets do the math...everyday headache equals 30 headaches a month. Im totally screwed. So, per my sweet Moms advice, I cut every single one of those pills in half in hopes to ration and not run out!! They seem to work at half the dose so hopefully Im good on Relpax. On the other hand, the everyday medicine has done NOTHING to prevent these headaches. I wake up everyday thinking I don't have a headache and then it hits....full force and then Im medicated for the rest of the day. And poor Mike. I can't imagine knowing that there is nothing you can do for your wife in pain everyday. Not only that, but Im not much fun anymore! So...I am changing doctors. I have done a lot of research and it seems that Topamax is the ticket for daily prevention. I have a few friends on it and they swear by it. So, Im gonna buck up and ask the dr specifically for this drug. Im done letting doctors look at me like I have 2 heads when I say nothing works. Im gonna be proactive so that we can return to our happy healthy life...headache free! Wish me luck and say prayers. My next appt. is Tuesday afternoon! (I have plenty of Relpax to get through!)

Next, fertility. Ugh. I hate that word. It really is getting to me. For those of you who read this and don't know, Mike and I have been struggling to get pregnant since the day we got married. I have a condition called PCOS that prevents me from ovulating. We have been on Clomid every month since September (with a short break). In January we learned that we were pregnant and also were informed that same day that I was in the process of miscarrying naturally. I was devastated but hopeful. I had gotten pregnant which was good news! That meant it could happen again. Well...needless to say, it hasn't. We have done 3 more rounds of Clomid (which I think has contributed to my chronic headache) at higher dosages but I have not ovulated since the miscarriage. Last week, my doctor (who I love) told me that I had become Clomid resistant and that if this round didn't work, that we were going to stop the Clomid and take a few months off. He is going to refer us to a fertility specialist after this round. Wow. I really wasn't expecting that but I think it is a good step for us. Im excited to get on with it and do more aggressive treatments! Who knows?? Maybe 2010 is our year! I know that some people struggle with this for longer than we have and have much more horrifying stories but this is my truth right now.

Im sooo sorry to be a Debby Downer, it is just all coming down around me today! If you feel the need, please pray for us. Pray that my headaches will subside and that we will be blessed with a baby in God's time and not ours! Oh, and that Mike can deal with me. Im kind of a pain. LOL!